Say it isn't so

Four words:

PROJECTILE VOMITING.  Every day.

If he didn't act so perfectly normal and happy, I might seriously wonder if there was something wrong.  Neither of my other boys ever had this problem and I now consider my past-self lucky. 

I've learned to dodge the vomit by leaning forward or to the side when I know it's coming.  When I don't realize it is on it's way . . . we are get totally covered in yellow fermenting milk curds.  You know the smell.

As my older boys say these days, "Oh yeah!"

Who me?

It's GO time

Meh meh meh
Blah blah blah

That's how I've been feeling the last couple of days.  I haven't really been able to put my finger on it exactly, until I realized, OH YEAH, it's because Blaine has been outside working every night until dark.  Yeah, yeah.  That's right.  Until dark.  Every day this week.

It's getting old for me and I know it is tiring for him too.  (And especially hard on both of us with the babe.  Me, needing a break, and him, missing him.)  I have to keep remembering that this is seasonal, and it will end.  It will.  But it might be another month. 

It is raining today, so I'm hoping he won't duke it out with the forces of nature and insist on planting the tomatoes tonight.  I'm pretty sure he won't.  And Lord knows we all need a break.

It is temporary.  Just temporary. 

I have to remember that.

I'm also in the middle of a massive Friends of the Library fundraising glut, where four events are converging in the space of three weeks.  (June is apparently GO! Month.)  Since I am the main organizer, that means I am doing things like recruiting all the volunteers and trying to figure out how many gallons of cole slaw are needed to feed 100 people.  (Five gallons, can you believe it??)

The cole slaw is what is needling me the most, actually.  I can't wait to have that conundrum behind me.

While I'm at it, I might as well insert some outright bragging --

Our Friends of the Library group has been in existence for 2.5 years now.  We have bought 4 different bookshelves for the library, spent somewhere around $600-700 in new books for the collection, and still have $4,000 in the bank. 

Yow.  We rule.

Crikes

Holy smokes, our Little Jamie is only 4 months old, not 5 months old like I (literally) thought at the beginning of the month.  (Did anyone catch that?)  Is this proof that he is my third child or what??  I can hardly keep track.

I suppose it doesn't help that he is 20 lbs (!!!)  and starting to sit up.  I was wondering why the other boys' baby calendars at 4 months didn't say anything about sitting up.  Geez louise.

Baby in Red

20 lbs, I know.  Insane.  What a lunk.  At this age, Diego was 19 lbs and Truen was 14 lbs.  It's like two fat sausages encasing a strip of bacon.  Yow, they are (were) big.

In other news, why do babies smell so wonderful?  I could take in all his scents forever, right down to the sour neck, which I've had so much trouble keeping tame this time around, and has earned him the nickname "Stinky".  I swear this kid will never know his real name.

Fat Stinky and his wittle giwaffe

Spring garden notes

We have had an extremely chilly spring this year.  Comparing this year to last, we are almost one month behind.  Yowza.  That's a big difference.  We were actually eating out of the garden at this time last year.  Aside from a chives, scallions, and a bit of lettuce, even a radish is a far-out dream at this point in time.

I've decided to do a pictorial tour of our garden this spring, to give people an idea of what it looks like at the beginning.  It ain't pretty.  In fact, viewing it from a distance is downright disheartening.  It looks like nothing -- scallions poke up from the dirt like little pine needles and fully planted beds look like nothing more than dirt patches scattered with a couple of measly leaves.

But come late June, it will be gloriously beautiful.

Blaine planted seeds in flats in January and February.  With heat mats and a little bit of sunlight and/or artificial lighting, they get a good start for summer.  He starts pretty much everything inside by seed, with the exception of winter/summer squash, melons, and cucumbers.

WAITING

"Hardening off" in flats behind the house:

cabbage, broccoli, onions, scallions

Hardening off = acclimating them to outdoor temps & sun

Only the cool-growing stuff could be planted at first

(this was taken a little over a week ago)

On the left: little tiny celery

On the right: sticks in ground, ready for peas

Far-back: potatoes

Waiting inside until warmth descends upon us:

Tomatoes, peppers, tomatillos, eggplant

PLANTING

The bulk done 5/7 and 5/8

 Opening up the asparagus bed --

The strawberry bed is on the other side of the garden entrance

The East Garden in background

and beyond that is the commodity crop fields.

 The East Garden: south side

Garlic (coming up under straw & leaves)

Beds of lettuce, scallions, onions, green beans

The boys' mini-gardens are the beds on the far-right --

Truen can't wait to plant his "wallermelons"

 The East Garden: north side

It may be hard to see, but this is entirely planted.

Foreground: celery, peas

Middle: broccoli, cabbage, chinese cabbages

Background: potatoes

The East Garden: midsection

kale, chard, spinach, mustard, lettuce

The grass paths are proof of last summer's insanity.

We over-extended ourselves and just couldn't keep up.

It was ugly.

At this point in time, the East Garden is almost completely planted.  The only things left are the heat-loving plants -- peppers, tomatoes, tomatillos, eggplant,  and one melon variety.  We planted, and I kid you not, 200 cabbages on Sunday.  That is a whole lotta sauerkraut!  I'm excited about it.

The West Garden, which is a little smaller than the East, will have all of our heat-loving vining plants -- winter/summer squash, melons, cucumbers, gourds, etc., and a couple of rows of sweet corn.

We are feeling much more under control this year.  I am actually able to participate for several hours each day on the weekend, with the baby's long afternoon nap.  I feel good (unlike last year with pregnancy) and the older boys are big enough to entertain themselves in the garden while we work.  Other than that, I do small tasks like water plants, gopher tools, seeds, and seedlings, bring out water and snacks, that kind of thing. 

Being able to talk and laugh while we plant has been fun.  It makes the tedious nature of the task (particularly those pine needle-like scallions!) much more pleasant.

I am so very glad we both have an interest in gardening -- I've thought many times of the impossibility if it were just one or the other.  It would be just too much. 

What a good team. ♥

Holy smokes

I've been saying holy smokes! in my head a lot recently.

Examples are as follows:

• Holy smokes!  You're 5 months old already?!
• Holy smokes, no wonder why you can almost sit up.
• Holy smokes!  Diego should be in the 6-8 year old Story Hour at the library this summer because he's going to be 6 in July?!  Where has time gone?
• Holy smokes, when was the last time I took a shower?
• Holy smokes!  I haven't posted on my blog in over a week!
• Holy smokes!  I have outstanding emails I need to respond to that are almost as old.
• Holy smokes, it is cold outside.
• Holy smokes, I'm so thankful for another sunny day . . . finally.
• Holy smokes, when is this kid going to nap?
• Holy smokes!  Why do I have to get up at 6:00 AM again??  Oh, you -- peed the bed, didn't go back to sleep after nursing, or desperately need a snack.
• Holy smokes, is Quiet Time already over??

And so on and so forth. 

(I should also add that things have finally normalized around here and I feel mush, mush better.  Oops, I mean much, much better.)

Pictures of the little tykes

 Easter egg hunting at G&G S.'s house

(Does this look like a Minnesota spring or what?)

 Nuzzling with his little giraffe toy

and almost too big for his 6-9 month sleeper

(I love that lower lip)

A towel-ed head

He's finally talking about getting his hair-cut

(Just in time for spring)

It's been rough

I've crafted many-a-post in my mind of late with no time to get at the computer, but now my mind is a pile of mush.

Mush, I tell you.

We are on the mend around here.  Ear infection, conjunctivitis, rumbling bowels, a slight cold, and the in-grown toenail have all been stamped out and/or healed.  Thankfully.  We have been home two weeks today and things are just starting to feel normal again.

But I still feel strange. 

I honestly feel like I am still recovering from the week-long unrelenting grind and nasty-screeching-whinefest that was Truen's ear and eye infections.  (Nothing was right, everything was wrong -- my jaw was clenched virtually all his waking hours.) 

My patience is thin.  I am antsy and irritated.  I am here, but not really present.  Annoyed with my children.  Cranky.  Feeling like I can't catch a break. 

I've honestly thought things like, "What on earth did I get myself into??" in regards to motherhood.  (Regretting motherhood?  Almost 6 years into it?!)  I wish I could send them into a time vortex where I don't have to deal with them for a few hours.  Or days.

Isn't that terrible?  But I suppose every mother feels that way at one time or another.  I know I've felt this way before. 

In spite of everything, in the midst of it . . . while they are asleep and looking like little angels, I look at them and feel teary about how they are growing and changing and wonder if I am good enough for them.  What a paradox.

And I do know, even while feeling angst verging on despair, that I am in the midst of transition.  And that transition is often the harbinger of stress. 

The smaller transition of coming back into "real life" after three weeks away.  There is always a rough period of re-entry, which seems particularly hard for the 3 year olds.  I remember Diego being pretty hard to deal with when he was three as well (and he wasn't even sick).

And more importantly, the larger transition of adding a baby into the mix -- which definitely shortens the already-sparse freedom of mind and movement.  I'm trying to remind myself to slow down and enjoy my children instead of feeling overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of the work that needs to be done.  It is hard not to feel bogged down by the almost-constant mess, even for those who are not naturally tidy.

I'll get over it.  I cannot wait to get over it.  I want to be a happy mama, not an unsmiling, short-tempered glum hag-of-a-bag-of-a-mama.

Perhaps a little spring and sunshine will help.  We have had ONE sunny day since I've been home.  Otherwise it has been snow (!!!), gray clouds, and rain.  Dreary, dreary, dreary.

In other (happier) news:
We started planting our garden this past weekend.  Potatoes, celery, and peas.  It is going to be a cold week with the lows in the mid-30's, so next weekend it will be radishes and lettuce. 

Last year at this time we had already eaten our first radish, which tells you how different this spring is from last.  Much, much colder.

With a dash of pinkeye

Add conjunctivitis to the list of maladies that has befallen us since we got home.  Truen.  He's at the tail-end of it (his ear infection too), but it has been a miserable few days. 

He is a beast when he isn't feeling well, a total beast.  Completely irrational and unreasonable.  He stretches me to the very end of my patience, leaving me totally sucked dry -- to the point of not even feeling sorry for him anymore.  It is terrible.

At least I was finally able to unpack yesterday.

Un-un-un-un

We're home!  Amazingly (or perhaps not) I missed both flights, there and back again.  The new rule is to arrive no later than 2 hours before the flight is scheduled for departure. 

No exceptions. 

I hate that, but I hate all the complications and angst that goes hand-in-hand with missing a flight way, way more.

And there is just something so funky about traveling with children.  Sickness seems to ensue more often than not.  And amazingly, we picked up 2-3 different things this time around.

Truen woke me up crying with an earache that very first night we were home.  An ear infection, his first at three years old.  He has an accompanying fever and hasn't wanted to eat much.  He tends to be very unpleasant when sick or hurt, so things have been pretty miserable around here. 

Diego?  Diarrhea.  His stomach has been bothering him on and off since last Sunday morning.  I haven't been able to pinpoint the cause, but it finally turned into full-out crampy diarrhea this morning.  Lovely.  He's laying on the couch with a hot salt pack on his belly right now.

The baby?  His second cold.  It is minor, thank goodness.  It is just as minuscule as his first cold at 6 weeks.  It hasn't interrupted his sleep at all, seems to be congested only at night, and is just as happy as usual.  I am so thankful for that.

So yes, I'm home.  But things aren't quite normal yet. 

We arrived home on Wednesday evening and I still have yet to unpack.

Over and out.

New favorites

We are still here with my parents in Western WA, though we are winding down towards the end of our three week visit.  I'm starting to get a little panicky, hoping that I haven't missed anyone and feeling the time-crunch of the End. 

That's why our visits are so long -- to enable a nice, leisurely visit vs. a frantic, frenzied week-long blitz.  I like it so much better that way, though we do miss Blaine.

The boys have been having a great time with Grandma and Grandpa.  "Fruit yogurt" from Grandma and lengthy games of Candy Land with Grandpa probably top the (very long) list.  My parents are having a nice time with the boys too, but have wondered "How on earth did we do it?!" in remembering of the energy-levels and constant direction that comes with little ones.

Here are a few of the boys' favorite things from this visit:

Spring!

Playing outside has been a big hit --

Diego still hasn't found a frog or a bird's nest,

but loves playing with the dog and has found many, many slugs.

Truen picks me dandelions almost every time he is outside.

 "Candy Island" with Grandpa --

Diego is particularly crazy about it.

One time he got the Candy Heart four times in one game.
Yowza.  That's a lot.

Truen usually plays a quarter or half-game 
before he gets bored and wanders off,
though he did last long enough to win yesterday.

Jamie's new trick:
Sucking on a strategically-placed clean diaper --
Very tasty with an intriguing mouth-feel.

A whole bunch of firsts

Grandpa O 

 Grandma O

Uncle Erik

Uncle Andrew and Brenda

Unky Ashley

 "Uncle" Jayna

Great-Gram C

(she couldn't stop smooching him)

I fell off the face of the earth and landed in Western WA

Yes, yes.  I'm alive.  After a whirlwind that included a weekend of both boys vomiting for 12-hours apiece (the day before we needed to leave, of course), I'm at my parents' house in Western Washington.

It is lovely -- lush, green spring.  Flowers are blooming, the air has that wonderfully-chill damp feel to it, and best of all, no coats required.  Sweater weather!  It feels so good.  Particularly with the fact that it is 10 degrees lower than usual at home and the landscape is covered, yet again, with SNOW.

Ugh.  Flee!

So we are here with my parents.  I've seen all siblings but one, was delighted by a surprise visit from my SIL who I didn't think I was going to get to see, saw the tide way, way out during the Supermoon, and, deliciously, have slept with the window open every single night.

Exploring the mud flats while the tide is out

Reading with Grandpa 

Just look what the Little Mister can do now!

I've been busy visiting, but I have also been kept on my toes by those little bouncing boys and my sweet baby.  I started this post several days ago!  I don't even know when . . . I've lost track.

As the baggage man at the airport said, "I don't know how you moms do it".  Seriously.  I don't know how we do it either.

The one thing I was pleasantly surprised by en route to my parents' house was the overall support and good attitude met by strangers.  I was prepared to start a ticker-chart of how many times I heard, "Oh boy, I see you have your hands full!" but I didn't hear it at all.  Not even once.

Instead, I heard "You are so patient . . . and what else can you be?  Great job, Mom!" and "You boys were very good little travelers" and (as they were going bananas in the bathroom, Diego running out into the halfway by himself just before) "It gets easier, I promise - enjoy those little guys while you can" and "Escalator??  No.  Let me help you find the elevator!"

It felt so good, particularly that first comment.  I patted her on the shoulder and said, "Thank you so much!  It is so encouraging to hear that."  And it was.  So encouraging.  Without a doubt, it helped me stay calm and work towards patience.

Patience is a skill, right?  One that we all have to work towards, especially with the little tykes.

Ho-ho-ho

We went to my in-laws last weekend for a mega-late Christmas celebration.  A broken ankle, a new baby, tons of snow, and influenza were some of the many reasons we weren't able to celebrate it closer to the actual date.

The boys had a fabulous time playing with their cousins. 

There are 13 cousins on the Borealis side of the family.  That number includes our boys, as everyone calls all the grandkids simply "the cousins".  My side of the family there are three cousins.  Just us.  The brothers.

There are three age groups of Borealis cousins: older, middle, and youngest.  My boys are in the youngest group, of course, and got to play with the other little guys.  It goes Levi (6), Diego (5), Mia (4), and Truen (3).  As you can imagine, there is a lot of racing around and hollering.  They just love it.

Unfortunately, I don't have pictures of the younger cousins playing (drat...I should have lined 'em up and got a shot), but I DO have a picture of the boys in the van in the garage after we got home.  I thought the pictures turned out kind of neat.

 Little Jamie all wrapped up and in the driver's seat.

(I swear by the swaddle, ladies...my boy-ohs love it.)

Diego was totally zonked.

Truen, not so much --

He had slept on the way there.

Love and loathing

Facebook. 

What a beautiful curse.  Or hideous blessing. 

Which one?

I hate Facebook for the fact that it is a timesuck.  It can stir discontent and jealousy.  At times it makes me wonder why my life is so boring.  I sometimes feel frenzied, like I need to look-look-look and I don't have enough TIME to see everything I could or should.  There are too many people to keep track of. 

Sometimes I am bothered by seeing wear and tear on my peers' faces while knowing that I, too, am aging.

I love Facebook because it keeps me connected to people that I care about.  Folks from my past, ones that I would only wonder about from a distance, and getting a glimpse of their lives.  I love the reconnection factor.  I really enjoy seeing my siblings in action and laughing at old and new jokes.

It can cause unforseen complications and delightful surprises. 

And with all this howling, one would think I'm on there several times a day.  Reality: a few times a month, tops.  Sometimes I even avoid it.

Blasted thing.  I love and hate you simultaneously.

Facebook.

Sweet freedom of mind and movement

All three boys are napping at the same time.  Mega "late" too, due to daylight savings. 

I have a Friends of the Library meeting tonight to get ready for and Squeeze is dropping off our van at the mechanic shop to have the front struts replaced.

The house is sunny and quiet.  It feels good.

Against all odds

My Number One Goal today was to get a picture of the brothers.  I'm contemplating getting a birth announcement out before my babe is 4 months old this time around.  Amazing, I know.  My idea is to send a picture of "just Jamie" along with a picture of the brothers together.

So . . . I've had to be strategic about it.  I gave Truen a haircut this week.  They took a bath this morning and even washed hair (a nightmare with Truen, still, at age 3 -- will it never end?!).  We picked out clean clothes and converged on the sunroom when it was nice and sunny, but not too bright.  It was in between naps for the baby, so I was hoping he would be sunny and bright as well.

He was, kind of.  I guess.  For a split second.

Here's how it started --

"Truen, look up!  Look up at me!"

(Oh dear . . . I think the baby is going to lose it)

Then things started going downhill fast,

still with "Truen, look at me!  At me!"

and poor Diego, disheartened.

Then the calamity hit the peak of ridiculousness.  I picked up the baby to calm him and stuck a pacifier in his mouth, which can usually turn his mood from rain-clouds to rainbows.  Sure enough, it worked.  He was happy and calmed.  I had the boys position themselves again, placed a refreshed baby back on their laps, got the camera ready, pulled out the plug, and two things happened simultaneously: the baby SMILED and the camera battery DIED.

Murphy's Law, right?  Sheesh.  I couldn't believe it.

So I put the battery in the charger and did something else for awhile.  After 5-10 minutes I figured the battery had enough juice and doggone it, we had spent the entire morning getting ready for this and I couldn't give up.

But this time ------- it didn't work.

The baby started hollering, which necessitated

Truen to cover his assaulted left ear,

while Diego languished in despair.

Amazing.  I couldn't give up, could I?  So I did what any frantic mama would do.  The most moronic and frenzied noises started flying out of me as I rocked backward and forward, acting as if I hadn't a brain in my head.  Muah!  Mrar!  Gpkkkkkkkk!



Annnnnnd they loved it.

The big boys giggled endlessly

while the baby seemed satiated, if not intrigued.

This one is my favorite of the two older boys

I like the baby's fat hands too ---

(he's starting to figure out how to get those buggers

up to his mouth for a nice long suck)

That last picture would never do in a card.  Ohhhhhhh well.... 

It was quite the adventure at the very least.

Just when I needed it

Sulcorebutia arenacea

This cacti is a descendant of a plant that was half-eaten by a squirrel while it summered on our back patio in Minneapolis.  It lived and, as you can see, prospered.  I adore the flaming vibrant orange of this cacti.  It seers my eye-sockets and leaves me begging for more.  Particularly on these still wholly white spring days.

There is something so charming and perhaps a little mysterious about a spiky plant blooming, isn't there?  I actually had to pull a sliver-spike out of Diego's hand this morning from this little beauty.  He's the one who found it in full bloom late yesterday afternoon (I had seen there were buds on it, but had forgotten).  The flowers close at night and re-open in the daylight hours, so some of them were half-closed when he showed me.

Diego brought it to me again this morning and I placed it in the middle of the kitchen table so we couldn't forget about it again.  I am keen on cultivating an interest in plants with my children.  There is so much intrigue and beauty to explore -- I want them to be awed by it.

I want to know

Why does salmon and squash taste so good together?  Has anyone else discovered this delightful combination?  It has got to be one of my favorites.

Today's lunch: leftover salmon cakes and the remnants of our very last butternut squash.  Delicious.

In other news: I've been virtually housebound for the last three weeks.  Influenza is to thank, of course.  "Spring" in Southwestern Minnesota feels like the dead of winter this year.  The snow has got to be mid-thigh and everything is still completely white. 

With this combo, I think I'm getting a little batty.

SF 59: Traffic Jam

I really love this song.

(I ended up getting sick, btw.  I can't tell if it is a minor version of the flu or the secondary infection [a cold]that the boys had after the initial sickness.  It isn't horrific, though I can't stop coughing, I've been terribly cold, and my hips in particular have been sore.  The baby is still healthy . .  and hopefully will remain so.)

Influenza update

Squeeze went back to work on Monday.  He feels like he is at 80% and took a nap almost as soon as he got home, the poor guy.

He missed all 5 days of work last week.  When you add that to the 5 days he took off for the baby's birth in January, that doesn't leave much for the rest of the year.  And it is only March 1st.  Ugh. 

Bloody influenza.

Diego ended up getting sick, unfortunately.  His fever started on Thursday night and broke in the early morning hours of Sunday AM.  He had all the same symptoms as the other two: fever, chills, headache, hurting eyeballs, etc.

Now what we are left with is that lingering hacking cough and a severe need for an early nap every day.

The baby and I are still holding out.  I've washed my hands so many times that my fingerprints must have worn off by now.  From what we've read, children can be contagious for up to two weeks after initial onset of symptoms, so I still have to exercise extreme caution for another week and a half.  The agony. 

I was having thoughts last night of giving up while nursing at 3:00 AM, which is insane, but I am so tired of being paranoid and viewing my own children as the enemy. 

I just can't wait until this whole mess is behind us.