The last couple of days, Starbeans keeps pulling down old photo albums to look at. I've been leafing through them and have been in shock that we lived a full 5 years of marriage and almost 4 years before that without our little munchkin. Can it be? Memories are flooding back and I remember...life before baby. It was good. It is strange to me that I barely remember it until I see a visual reminder. Life is good now as well, but very different. I look at pictures of our apartment and think, "Ack! A baby would tear that place apart!" Ah, yes...life is different.
One thing that particularly struck me was how great I looked. Why did I worry that I wasn't up to par when my skin was so clear and fresh and young and smooth? Feelings of doubt certainly didn't dominate my thought-life then, by any means; but it lurked in the shadows. Ridiculous. I should be listening to myself present-tense, because I know I'll be saying the same things 5-10 years from now. Damn, I look good.
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